Who I Am
Who I Am
a little girl
who i used to be
in the midst of a garden
an oasis of beauty
she danced in freedom
with a heart of humility
i lost her
the little me
drowned by insecurity
suffocated by a cocoon of fear
she looked at me
the sparkle in her eyes disappeared, “why are you so afraid? that’s not how you were made! what about the other butterflies? who’s going to help them learn how to fly?”
a smile formed on my face, “i miss you, will you please help me?”
her eyes grew bigger and started to twinkle.
a butterfly landed on her nose
and it began to wrinkle
she grabbed my hand and led me into a butterfly dance.
It all began with a vision.
There was a gentle hand reaching out to me, I held it and began to spin as if it were my father looking down to me. Closing my eyes, I looked around in a field full of fresh baby breath flowers. I was running freely to a figure in the far distance. Next to the figure was a tree that looked like a hand stretching to the sky, the hand that invited me to dance. The figure was a man dressed in white, holding out His arms to me. But, I knew I wasn’t alone. I looked over my left shoulder, then my right. I saw thousands, possibly more, running joyfully next to me. Then, I heard a voice say, “Anika, you are going to make disciples.”
I grew up in a Christian family but I didn’t understand what a relationship with Jesus was yet. At a young age, I had a tender love for the Lord, even though I didn’t fully know the depths of God and His presence in my life. Over several years of encountering Him, I began to hear His voice clearly. I heard Him speak softly about who He created me to be.
The Lord told me He was going to turn me into a beautiful butterfly. He revealed to me how I was dead in my cocoon. I hid from others, letting pride suffocate me. When I heard His gentle whisper, He said I had to die to myself so I could come back to life. Lay down my hurt, selfish desires, and fear at His feet. He would transform my innermost being, so my heart could encounter the breath of life. It was a season that renewed my mind, soul, and spirit. It set the trajectory for my life. Layers began to fall and colors peaked anxiously as they waited. My wings weren’t meant to break.
I am just a nobody from a podunk town, how could I possibly weave into a greater story?
And so it begins…
Upper Bunk
[a place to rest in & with Him]
A ministry I have recently started out of a heart of brokenness for my generation. How I long for my people to fix their eyes on Jesus.
MISSION
Understanding GOD as a friend, father, and bridegroom. Learning how to minister to the heart of the LORD and listen to how He speaks to us & how we can be in conversation with Him daily.
No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you FRIENDS, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. [ JOHN 15:15 ]
But now, O Lord, you are our FATHER; we are the clay, and you are our potter; we are all the work of your hand. [ ISAIAH 64:8 ]
The one who has the bride is the BRIDEGROOM. The friend of the bridegroom, who stands and hears him, rejoices greatly at the bridegroom's voice. Therefore this joy of mine is now complete. [ JOHN 3:29 ]
HOW IT ALL STARTED
I had a heavy heart, resulting from a year of brokenness and hurt. Both from my own selfishness, being tossed around by waves of cruelness in the world, and a broken church. Out of a repentant and torn heart, I sat with the Lord in the wilderness. I knew He wanted me to start stepping into a leadership role, one that spoke truth and authority - even though I felt like I was the most unqualified to do so.
The LORD has been restoring my voice in many ways. All my life, the devil tried to destroy my voice because he knew it was a powerful weapon that would devour his lies. He literally tried to kill me in my mothers womb, but GOD had a different plan for me.
ABBA has been revealing to me how His people need to start focusing on teaching how to read and meditate on scripture. Many believers articulate what scripture means, without teaching the lost how to meditate on the word themselves… AND HOW EXCITING IT IS! What would it look like if we lived an abundant life by meditating on GOD’s words morning, noon, and night?
Out of a mystified mind, I thought I wasn’t capable of discipleship. Then GOD told me that He’s already given me the words. I don’t have to make anything up (and I shouldn’t), it’s already there for me - all I have to do is gaze at Him and utter His sweet words back to Him. A shift would happen if we uttered His words out loud - because that’s what the Jews had done… all they had were limited manuscripts. They didn’t have millions of Bibles, they literally wrote His words on their hearts by speaking them verbally - daily.
WHAT WE DO
Listening to HOLY SPIRIT is critical in everything we do. We partner with the Kingdom of GOD by interceding for others. Intercession can look like praying scripture out loud, dancing, shouting, being undignified, silence, stillness, anything aligning with scripture. We declare truth over GOD’s children by studying and meditating, awakening hardened hearts - with the authority and power of Christ.
We are a group of artists who sing and worship in truth, believing YESHUA can shift atmospheres. Ministering to the heart of GOD is a gift, we learn how to hear His voice clearly and lean on our beloved. Understanding we are being weaved into a greater story, desiring our heart beat to be in tune with ABBA’s.
THE BUNKHOUSE
where it all began
Sow Into My Ministry
I have many expenses as a starving artist. I’ll admit that was a little dramatic… but if you feel led to partner with the Kingdom of God, I will attach a few ways that you could give.